I wish I had learned to be more independent earlier on in life. This wud not have been so painful. Perhaps, it is a lesson that is best learned this way, heart-wrenching though it may be.
One cannot exercise control on fate. No matter how strongly you will your love to protect those you love, it cannot.
It is the most humbling thing to feel so completely helpless. Like S. told me, "Every little girl has to grow up one day." I just wish it wudnt have been this tough on me. Or perhaps, I am too weak to bear this cross without crumbling like this.
I am grateful tonight that this blog is actually this therapeutic for me. I'm a lot calmer now that I've typed this out.